Hurm.. almost 10 years.. i wish everything in my life going to be okay.. im sad with no one left for me to lean and cry.. even a person to call a friend.. kenape ye.. kenape life aku mcm ni.. hurm.. ramai lagi teruk countered lot of things in their life.. but not going to be selfish but im talking bout my life..
Sedihnye bila kite sedar there is nobody beside us to just for us to faking a smile..
Sampai tahap aku fikir ape purpose utk aku hidup.. dont give me religion comments..
Hurm.. this is the only place that i can talk bout my feelings, biar pon unheard unknown but sikit2 aku release dari kesedihan.. writing and reading kdg buat kite stress free.. dont hand me the fidget, i will throw that thing to the wall.. makin buat aku stress.. be realistic..
Hurm takpelah.. nanti aku okay sikit aku type balik.. otak penat.. bye.. 😖
Saturday, December 2, 2017
Monday, November 21, 2016
BERAS BASAH
Beras Basah
Ade sebelom dan selepas..
Contra pada hidup..
Hipokrit pada perjalanan yang dilalui..
Mengharap kan balasan yang dinanti..
Zaman sekarang 2016.. susah betol nak cari manusia ikhlas.. membuat tanpa balasan.. jgn kata kelakuan, perasaan pon memaksa2 dibalas. Menyintai hanya kerana dicintai.. bukan kerana haty yang memilih untuk mencintai.. salah ke cinta tanpa memiliki ? Salah ke rasa tanpa minta balasan ? Entah.. apa yang ditutur tidak sama dengan niat dihaty.. ape yg dijanji tak sama dengan apa yang dinanty.. apa yang diluah tak sama yg diingini.. MANUSIA, apa yang beza ? Ya niat berbeza.. manusia, sering khilaf memilih jalan.. terus menyalah kan takdir menentukan..
Ade waktu kita bukan hipokrit tapi adakala, ada haty yg perlu dijaga.. ada adab yang perlu diturut, ada budaya yang terus dipikul.. bukan kerana mencerminkan diri lain dari sebenar.. akan tetapi masih punya sedikit ilmu untuk menghormati orang lain ? Hanya mereka yang berpandangan luas mengerti. Hanya yang berfikiran panjang mampu memahami..
Faham erti beras basah ? Kekhilafan yang pernah dilakukan terhadap seseorang berulang, cermin di tapak bumi mula berfungsi.. waktu itu , tabah la wahai insan yang bernama manusia. Ye mungkin mengecewakan kamu. Terus la kuat untuk terus percaya.. tidak seperti yg kita mahu tp teruslah ikhlas kuatkan niat.. insyaAllah.. haty tetap teguh..
Tak jauh dari pandangan, tidak juga menikam hempedu.. namun teruslah tersenyum.. Sampai bila nak terus jaga haty ? Ye sampai maty. Kite bakal disakiti walau dari mana2 pihak.. pilih untuk sendiri ? Itu pilihan kamu.. teruskan.. dari terus menjaga haty.. mereka ? Bukan bidang kuasa mereka.. kamu buat ape yang kamu fikir kamu inginkan.. kamu pilih hidup kamu.. tp setiap yang kurang pasti punya sesuatu.. dan sebaliknya..
Tulisan ku bukan utnuk difahami, tapi jika kau pernah lalui.. kau pasti membaca dengan intonasi emosi diri.. 😊
Monday, August 31, 2015
Leo
( I SAW THIS IN MY DRAFT)
HI DARLING !
Lama tak masuk and merepek2.. since i have nobody to share so i wanna share this story to you guys,
*cerite ni campur bahasa. Was made on 31/08/15 - 23:18PM and i try to make it short even its damn long.
LEO 2006 - 2016
Well the story starts like this, mule kenal this guy like 2006 lepas habis sekolah. Since i tak further my study so i work at this one of the saloon in the City. I met this guy, he was cute..shy..humble.. and some kind of nerd la. I notice dia suka i since i suka kacau dia ni. Dan kitorg pon mule lah berdating. Masa tu keje kemana, ape kemana, Happy together katenye. Selama kami kenal xpernah kami tau tentang hal diri masing2 lebih dalam. Even we both tak tau nama sebenar masing masing,he willing to ride to me after work everyday just to sent me back home or just to go makan. 1st time i langgar lampu merah (which is memang takde kereta lah pukol berape pagi dah) and i was a bit social nak compare dengan dia masa tu. So kitorg broke up tanpa penjelasan ape ape. Dia dah habis belajar, and dia nak balik ke Kampung dia. For me masa tu , well people leave anyway, why should i bother. I was never serious pon sebab masa tu maseh muda remaja,yang i tau enjoy je. 😂 .
Well i went to nowhere, teruskan hari2 mcm biase. Tapi ade lah contact kadang kadang thru FB, Msg and last time 2012 contact via Blackberry. You guys tau kan time tu tengah sebok2 org nk share BBPIN, kitorg pon same. But on that time dia ni ade girlfriend tau, and i takdelah bother hal dia ni sangat.
By 2012 i started my life in KL. Merantau tempat org sorang sorang, so kat KL i keje hotel dekat tengah tengah bandar. Happen that day he called me, right after a little text. he called me at 2AM. Dia cakap dia nak nyanyi 😅 . Actually kejap lagi i nak kerja at 6AM tau . Tapi taknak kecewakan orang, takpelah i tadah jelah mata dan telinga ni untuk dengar. Dia nyanyi Over The Rainbow. Hurm.. and our conversation didn't stop by the song. Hari hari pulak chat sampai lah satu hari dia ajak lepak. Pergi jelah lepak, he brought his friend but i came alone.
Days goes by. Dia ni kerja tak jauh dari KL, tak jadi masalah lah setakat nak drive thru. Mase tu dia ni tengah problem dengan kerja dia ni, masa tu pulak i ni single,easy nak pergi mana mana. I pon pergi lah jumpe dia dekat sane, as he claimed that he got fever. Kitorg makin rapat, dia pun cakap dia ni dah single balik. Entah i tak pasti lah kesahihan tu. HAHA. So dipendekkan cerite ni, hubungan kitorg going well. Sampai lah tahap dia kena balik kampung dia sebab kerja dia ade masalah.
29 April 2013
I planned dengan one of my girlfriend nak visit dia kat sana, since KL ke kampung dia ambil masa 5 jam perjalanan But thing went mess, i accident and i was scared. Tak pernah accident before. At first i malas nak call and inform dia sebab it was a surprise, but then my girlfriend keep asking me to asked for his help to come. Dia ni takde transport nak datang, but still he came by renting a car.
Everything started on 29 April 2013. Officially together.
Kitorang together sampai kenal family and planned to get married, but honestly im not ready. Banyak sangat perangai dia buat i makan hati.
By 2015 we went apart. And to be honest, i do miss him since dia lah satu satunya manusia i shared everything. I takde mak ayah or adek beradek, kawan ade tapi semua jauh. Dengan dia lah paling i rapat. No secrets between us. I nak dia berubah, belajar untuk serious dan tanggungjawab dalam keputusan yang dia buat. He told me he love me. But i dont see the effort, i yang makan hati ade lah. He tried every way to keep me as his GF, But i dont feel like it. I dah nekad nak putus even dia tak agree.
In the mean time i kenal sorang mamat ni. I baru lepas break so takde hati lah nak bercinte ke ape, setakat kawan borak je.
Then dalam masa yang sama Leo tetap cari i, stalk i, chat i, and asek tanya "kalau i dah berubah,u balek dengan i tak ?" . Serious hati perempuan ni kesian, tapi dia kena belajar erti menghargai .
Dalam pada masa sama jugak Leo cari kawan baru, to ease the pain. I got no problem with it as that might help him to move on. Hati ni tak sampai nak tengok dia sedih macam tu, tapi sampai bila nak sabar dengan perangai dia. I tak pernah curang, tak pernah nak cari yang lain. I xpernah putus asa bila dia tak kerja, i cuba usaha cara i, tapi sampai bila. As i mentioned. Even macam tu pun , i gave him my car for him to move around as kerja dia perlukan transport. unlike mine, i boleh tumpang kawan or public transport.
OK lah i story a bit okay what makes me disappointed sangat about him. Start dari accident tu, im the one yang kerja cari duit, we live together. Yes . Pagi i nak pergi kerja i akan masak, and i kerja hotel so balek agak lambat jugak kadang kadang. Kerja dia kat rumah ? membuta je dari pagi sampai ke malam. Pernah i jalan kaki dari tempat kerja malam malam pukul sebelas tengah hujan renyai, sebab dia membuta dan handphone dia mati. The way to our house, semua nya high way. So tell me about it. Another thing, dia ni xpernah habes dengan masalah perempuan. Pernah i balik kerja penat, i just wash up and sleep. In the middle of the night i terjaga i spot dia tengah chat senyum senyum , i intai. Dengan entah girl mana, so i sambung tido. I am damn tired guys. And pernah kantoi chat dalam FB and phone dia semua. Dia ni pun ade masalah untuk uruskan duit. I kerja penat semata nak try to support dia bangun balik and supaya dia dapat kerja. I sewa motor untuk senang pergi kerja, kitorg takde duit sampai nak isi minyak pun takde. Pernah i tumpang posmen halfway sb motor mati tengah highway. Nak beli makan pon kadang ikat perut makan roti. Disebabkan masalah transport, i selalu datang lambat so i berhenti kerja and cepat2 cari kerja lain yang senang dapat public transport. I bagi dia kereta i lepas kereta i keluar bengkel, and i gave him my 1 st salary to him to get a laptop, supaya dia boleh start cari kerja. As he mention he needed that. I hutang orang like RM1500 ( aku xpernah berhutang before waima macam mana susah pon life aku, xpernah sesusah ni) that money for him star up bisnes. Tapi tak jalan, so hutang lagi RM3500. company build i started pergi ssm and pay stuff.His 1st payment dari job dia, satu sen pon dia takde nak hulur, jangan kan hulur. Tanya pon takde, tau2 duit habes je. But hutang i jenis cepat2 clear kan dulu. Kerja dia membuta even ade project baru, petang nak senja baru lah pergi site. which is memang problem, sampai i kena turun site and handle some stuff myself. I have no knowledge about his job tapi i learn, so i turun padang and to help him, i do it myself some of the job which is itu kerja wak wak kontrak. Kereta kecik i tu lah yang guna untuk angkut whatever stuff nak pergi site. Naseb tak angkut batu bata or scaffolding je. Kerja berjudi even takde bakat berjudi. Tak dapat judi mesin, judi online berhabes ribu ringgit. Makan minum rokok berhutang kat mamak kedai depan, dapat gaji i settlekan semua every month. See why i penat ? Ni kire summary jelah. Banyak sangat nak story.
Pendekkan cerita , as i dont know whether its true or not. Dia asyik sedih dan nanges dengan situasi kitorg ni. My guy friend yang tau pasal ni pulak asek push me to stop thinking bout Leo as he is useless. I ni pulak tak boleh dengar dia susah, dia sakit or dia jadi ape ape. I masih Concern. Dia yang paling rapat dengan i dalam dunia ni beb, mesti lah i peduli. Kadang dia cakap takde duit nak makan or perlukan duit, I bebel tapi I tetap hulur. Dalam hati i biarpun kita tak bersama , i tetap doakan Leo berjaya dalam hidup . Pernah i demam tak larat nak keluar rumah, Leo tanya dan call tapi i marah marah. Keep asking me dah makan ke belom. Tapi dia insist beli kan makan (he know my FAV food) dan sangkut dekat depan pintu rumah i. HAHA. (He never done this before).
Ade satu mase ni his family keep calling me in the morning at the office, telling that Leo wants to get married with another girl which is he only knows her like 5 days, and the family keep asking me to get back dengan Leo. (konon nak ugut i get back dengan dia) Like i said i will not!. lantak dia lah nak kawen dengan sapa pon. i memang dah nekad xnak dengan dia lagi. And his family said kalau i terima Leo balek, he might change after married, so maybe i can give him a chance. So i advise them just accept her lah, who knows dia berubah dengan that girl.
Happens to know after that Leo dah ade another girlfriend baru, i mean real GF since i notice how he story bout her. To be honest, feeling agak jealous sebab dia tu rapat dengan i je. Korang pernah rasa tak bila bestfriend korang ade kawan lain, haaa... macam tu la.Tapi i tak kacau diorang . Let them be, atleast dia dah move on, good things.
Leo making it, dia makin okay lah sikit since dia dapat kerja baru. Then tak putus asa, lunch mesti ajak i pergi makan. Sometimes tak sempat lah my time nak collab dengan dia. Sometimes dia akan cerita lah pasal GF baru dia ni. I ni suka joke dengan dia and tanya soalan soalan bodoh, for us bende tu funny. It still is. HAHA. TApiiii... dia ni pelik lah, dah ade GF tapi keep asking me to be with him. Siap belikan bunga dan coklat. (Whole life dia tak pernah buat ni dengan i). Still called me Baby,even i refuse and asked him to stop calling me by that as dia ni dah ade GF. And actually i menyampah panggil panggil baby when we no longer together. But he said he still love me. He still got feeling towards me, and im the only one that he loved the most.Dia ni serious ke tak dengan GF dia ni. Dalam hati ade jugak fikir, entah entah dia ni saja buat cerita pasal GF dia sebab nak i jealous kot. But i never bother to think more about that.
And i rimas my guy friend keep asking me to stop helping Leo, jadi i pon stop be friend with that guy.
Sampai lah satu waktu Raya he prefer to spend it with me, i said i wanna go far to release my stress. Since i dont have a family, i takdelah kampung nak balik. Last time pon i balik kampung si Leo ni mase bercinte dulu. Tapi i fed up bila orang tanya kenapa tak balek kampung. Then asked bout my dead parents pulak. Malas lah. I dapat bonus kerja, takde masalah bab duit ni nak pergi mana I nak pergi. Leo nak ikot mana i pergi, penat i halau dia balik kampung dia or balik kampung GF dia. Tapi buang masa je.
The vacation is the best time i ever had in my life. I tak pernah travel like that and spending money like nobody business (cuti Raya Panjang oii) . Halfway to vacay place kereta pulak bateri out. Naseb i memang i ade knowledge handle stuff alone, and i called my insurans to tow and replace the battery. Dia ade belanja i jugak, like shopping, makan and stuff,ambil hati i lah katakan. (Masa ni dia baru start bisnes lain dari skop kerja dia). And i still jokes about his GF which is , that girl is real and they all together. I asked him pergi balik kampung his GF pon taknak. So i ni confuse dia ni serious or tak (dalam masa yg sama he treat me like his GF) .
Anyway the new business pon, we started together actually. As i mentioned, dia ni takde transport to handle stuff like pergi mana2 still using my car, but this time i dah ambik balek my car, (which is penat i fought for it, siap i bocorkan tayar kete i sendiri and nyaris i nak pecah my own rear mirror sebab i geram) and hutang kereta and saman all together cecah RM5k. i settled everything my own. -see why i really fed up ? Dia start new business and i help him to bring him around to buy stuff and sometimes i do delivery for him. Dia dengan GF dia takde transport time ni. And i still can freely scroll his phone, and i saw the conversation with his GF which is jealous sebab selalu dengan i. So i replied to her using his phone ( which is i know kind of like super duper annoying attitude) sebab i dah terbiase like that. I replied " kalau taknak dia selalu dengan aku, kau beli lah kereta and u guys go around together easier". (perangai aku mcm haram kan) IK. And dia memang dah biase dengan perangai biadap aku.
After habes raya, GF dia dpt lah kete baru, katenye bapak dia kasi. i pon tak check lah. So i tak kisah sangat, i pon slow2 mcm jarakkan diri. I cuba berkawan dengan another guy and cuba isi masa lapang dengan cara i. I memang suka living alone, buat ape nak buat. Tapi Leo selalu mengadu GF dia xboleh handle business dia, lintang pukang dengan postage and all. So i was like malas lah nk bother, bukan urusan i. Ajar jelah GF kau tu. HAHA. I was up and down dengan Leo dlu, so this is her time pulak lah nak rasa. Takkan baru 3 bulan dah give up.
Leo ni, i tak faham ape masalah dia. Dia keep asking about the man that i always go out with. so i bagitau jelah pasal mamat tu tapi tak detail lah, sebab mamat tu kawan biase i je. (Actually mamat tu pon dah fed up bila lepak asek cakap pasal Leo, and he said i tak moved on) IDK. So Leo asked me to stop jumpa that guy lah ape semua. Eh rimas..
While im with my own world tak kacau life dia, dia tak pernah putus text even once a day. Nak di jadikan cerita satu hari, tgh pagi buta, while i was sleeping ade orang pecah masuk bilik i guna tingkap belakang rumah, he was about nak capai my handbag beside me, lucky i tersedar bila the rod kena bahu i. Seriously masa ni memang takot gila. Macam trauma pon ade. I tak tau siapa i nak contact, like seriously. Naseb ade akak housemate bilik atas. Sumpah menggigil masa ni. Then i told Leo, he asked me to go to his place, untuk teman i malam tu and Leo asked me to move from there. Dia akan carikan rumah baru which is studio apartment, lagi secure dia cakap. Dia cakap dia pon risau. Esok tu i pergi balai polis and buat report. Seram betol.
And actually masa ni Leo like seriously nak get back dengan i but i tak rasa dia serious, dia cakap dia nak break dengan GF dia. Dia cakap takde feelings and all. Taktau lah mana nak percaya, actually dia ni kalau berbual 100 cakap 1 belum tentu betul. To prove his right, i asked him to dump his GF or i sendiri akan pergi tanya, so dia cakap bagi dia masa. Sebab dia tak sampai hati nak break her heart like that. Then i cakap so u choose lah mana u nak. He said he chose me. I dont believe him. Show me !
Business Leo ni, i buat paperwork and HR stuff from my office, most of the time cari source and supplier or some buyers. Benda ni betul2 buat i busy with my own life. And Leo asked me to quit my job so i can handle his business which is he said that im the one who can understand what he needs. Promised me that he will give me my share, actually company pon buat account nama kami berdua. I handle those, but my percentage i just put 20% je. (He advised me this ) . I hired secretary and all to do proper company, sebab taknak jadi macam bisnes dia sebelom ni. (bisnes sebelom ni pon pemiutang asek call and contact me to get him, dia ni suka avoid problem, alasan taknak fikir problem) .
There is one day, i texted his GF to meet her. She was scared i think, so i asked her to choose the place to meet. Tapi hari yang sama jugak he was about to give me the new house key. Sengaja i mintak dia cari kat mana i nak jumpe GF dia, coz i nak tengok reaksi dia. I met his GF and talk a little, pada masa yang sama dia text dah sampai and dia lalu, hajat hati dia nak ajak i lunch sama, while he peek smiling and hand over to me the key, he saw his GF beside me. Muka dia dah berubah and cepat cepat dia blah. I texted him, "mana kau nak pergi, kau settle bende ni hari ni jugak !" Jadi lah aksi kejar mengejar, antara kereta kecik aku dan kereta besar dia. ( He got the car coz business was doing good) Well i ade satu apps yg boleh kesan kemana je dia pergi. Psycho kan aku HAHA, sebab aku dah penat asek kene tipu. Last stop dia dekat je dengan office dia, masa tu jumpe client, so dah banyak borak dengan his GF ni. So i dah faham lah ape yg jadi, i lagi kenal Leo. Dia punya putar belit i dah masak.I biarkan dia settle kan dengan his client first and all. Dah settle i saw him came out from the place towards his car's. Again we followed and i texted him. Dia pening. Dari pukol 6PM sampai 8PM aksi kejar mengejar, and dia gave up and asked me to meet him dekat one of the cafe nearby. Last i asked him, "aku nak tau tu je, Dia atau Aku. choose now or never". Dia pon text lah i dia pilih i dan dia text GF dia said he still loves me. Well im done for today, i asked his GF to go and meet him, i got the answer and its enough. Coz i know what will happen after. So i get away from that place, he texted me telling his GF cry like a river,well i dont give a damn. Aku dah biase. Asked me to meet somewhere together with his GF, so jadi lah perbincangan 6 mata, i was sitting behind and he was with his GF infront of the car. I asked, what else. His GF opens the door and sit outside, He said his GF redha kalau jadi bini number dua . What ?! (actually aku takde terfikir pasal kawin pon lagi, tapi GF dia sampai mcm tu skali. ) damn gurl..I said its okay, i prefer not to interfere. I gave him the house key back and i walked towards my car. He run after me and grab me said he love me and asked me to get into the car back while his GF was already inside the car. Keadaan jadi sunyi kejap, suddenly his GF keluar dari kereta and blah. Kitorang sambung borak , and his phone rang. He get out from car and after 2 minutes came back. He said when i was running away, he grab me but when his GF was away he act nothing bout that. So GF dia ni jelaous lah pasal tu. After that aku dah penat so aku blah je balik rumah aku. Fed up dengan drama merepek ni.
Lepas kejadian tu few days, Dia cakap dia dah break dengan GF dia, but dia tak boleh menipu dengan i, mesti kantoi. One day i stay dekat office dia sebab he asked me to wait for him, i just wait in the car je. ( he dont know that i was in the car infront of his office) . After an hour, i saw his GF car's. Lalu sebelah i je, so i saw what happened . Dia baru keluar dari kereta GF dia, so i texted him. Dia macam gelabah. Right there he entered his car and i was furious ! I was about to go to his GF car and tell about everything. He stopped me. My gila dah sampai,he come to me but i drove away to chase his GF. I text him, ill follow his GF and i will tell about everything. I was at my rage, sampai situasi jadi kejar mengejar, dia kejar i from his car, i langgar kereta dia and i stop, i keluar kereta i and sepak kereta dia. And i teruskan perjalanan cari his GF. Untill dia gave up and we met, nearby the place when we was talking together the other day. On the street i shouted and i saw his car nearby. Hampir lah dia nak tampar muka i coz i cabar dia. Masa tu memang i gila.
Rupanya, the day i got my new house, the GF got it too . Both new house rent je, so dia cuma tolong byr upfront. No wonder lah nye punnn.. HAHA..
Permintaan i simple je, GF dia atau I. Kalau dia pilih GF dia, he can just go and dont bother my life, kite putus segala hubungan yang ade and i wont contact him anymore even i akan block dia from any social. Maksudnya putus dari segalanya, sebab i nak move on and i want him to move on and focus dengan life dia jugak. we both have our own life kan. Sampai bila nak mcm ni. Sampai bila i nak concern pasal dia je like i dont have my own life, sampai bila nak kasih sane sayang sini and sampai bila nak buat i confuse. Kalau dia pilih i, dont bullshit me as i damn know all his shit. Thats all.
CONTINUE...
HI DARLING !
Lama tak masuk and merepek2.. since i have nobody to share so i wanna share this story to you guys,
*cerite ni campur bahasa. Was made on 31/08/15 - 23:18PM and i try to make it short even its damn long.
LEO 2006 - 2016
Well the story starts like this, mule kenal this guy like 2006 lepas habis sekolah. Since i tak further my study so i work at this one of the saloon in the City. I met this guy, he was cute..shy..humble.. and some kind of nerd la. I notice dia suka i since i suka kacau dia ni. Dan kitorg pon mule lah berdating. Masa tu keje kemana, ape kemana, Happy together katenye. Selama kami kenal xpernah kami tau tentang hal diri masing2 lebih dalam. Even we both tak tau nama sebenar masing masing,he willing to ride to me after work everyday just to sent me back home or just to go makan. 1st time i langgar lampu merah (which is memang takde kereta lah pukol berape pagi dah) and i was a bit social nak compare dengan dia masa tu. So kitorg broke up tanpa penjelasan ape ape. Dia dah habis belajar, and dia nak balik ke Kampung dia. For me masa tu , well people leave anyway, why should i bother. I was never serious pon sebab masa tu maseh muda remaja,yang i tau enjoy je. 😂 .
Well i went to nowhere, teruskan hari2 mcm biase. Tapi ade lah contact kadang kadang thru FB, Msg and last time 2012 contact via Blackberry. You guys tau kan time tu tengah sebok2 org nk share BBPIN, kitorg pon same. But on that time dia ni ade girlfriend tau, and i takdelah bother hal dia ni sangat.
By 2012 i started my life in KL. Merantau tempat org sorang sorang, so kat KL i keje hotel dekat tengah tengah bandar. Happen that day he called me, right after a little text. he called me at 2AM. Dia cakap dia nak nyanyi 😅 . Actually kejap lagi i nak kerja at 6AM tau . Tapi taknak kecewakan orang, takpelah i tadah jelah mata dan telinga ni untuk dengar. Dia nyanyi Over The Rainbow. Hurm.. and our conversation didn't stop by the song. Hari hari pulak chat sampai lah satu hari dia ajak lepak. Pergi jelah lepak, he brought his friend but i came alone.
Days goes by. Dia ni kerja tak jauh dari KL, tak jadi masalah lah setakat nak drive thru. Mase tu dia ni tengah problem dengan kerja dia ni, masa tu pulak i ni single,easy nak pergi mana mana. I pon pergi lah jumpe dia dekat sane, as he claimed that he got fever. Kitorg makin rapat, dia pun cakap dia ni dah single balik. Entah i tak pasti lah kesahihan tu. HAHA. So dipendekkan cerite ni, hubungan kitorg going well. Sampai lah tahap dia kena balik kampung dia sebab kerja dia ade masalah.
29 April 2013
I planned dengan one of my girlfriend nak visit dia kat sana, since KL ke kampung dia ambil masa 5 jam perjalanan But thing went mess, i accident and i was scared. Tak pernah accident before. At first i malas nak call and inform dia sebab it was a surprise, but then my girlfriend keep asking me to asked for his help to come. Dia ni takde transport nak datang, but still he came by renting a car.
Everything started on 29 April 2013. Officially together.
Kitorang together sampai kenal family and planned to get married, but honestly im not ready. Banyak sangat perangai dia buat i makan hati.
By 2015 we went apart. And to be honest, i do miss him since dia lah satu satunya manusia i shared everything. I takde mak ayah or adek beradek, kawan ade tapi semua jauh. Dengan dia lah paling i rapat. No secrets between us. I nak dia berubah, belajar untuk serious dan tanggungjawab dalam keputusan yang dia buat. He told me he love me. But i dont see the effort, i yang makan hati ade lah. He tried every way to keep me as his GF, But i dont feel like it. I dah nekad nak putus even dia tak agree.
In the mean time i kenal sorang mamat ni. I baru lepas break so takde hati lah nak bercinte ke ape, setakat kawan borak je.
Then dalam masa yang sama Leo tetap cari i, stalk i, chat i, and asek tanya "kalau i dah berubah,u balek dengan i tak ?" . Serious hati perempuan ni kesian, tapi dia kena belajar erti menghargai .
Dalam pada masa sama jugak Leo cari kawan baru, to ease the pain. I got no problem with it as that might help him to move on. Hati ni tak sampai nak tengok dia sedih macam tu, tapi sampai bila nak sabar dengan perangai dia. I tak pernah curang, tak pernah nak cari yang lain. I xpernah putus asa bila dia tak kerja, i cuba usaha cara i, tapi sampai bila. As i mentioned. Even macam tu pun , i gave him my car for him to move around as kerja dia perlukan transport. unlike mine, i boleh tumpang kawan or public transport.
OK lah i story a bit okay what makes me disappointed sangat about him. Start dari accident tu, im the one yang kerja cari duit, we live together. Yes . Pagi i nak pergi kerja i akan masak, and i kerja hotel so balek agak lambat jugak kadang kadang. Kerja dia kat rumah ? membuta je dari pagi sampai ke malam. Pernah i jalan kaki dari tempat kerja malam malam pukul sebelas tengah hujan renyai, sebab dia membuta dan handphone dia mati. The way to our house, semua nya high way. So tell me about it. Another thing, dia ni xpernah habes dengan masalah perempuan. Pernah i balik kerja penat, i just wash up and sleep. In the middle of the night i terjaga i spot dia tengah chat senyum senyum , i intai. Dengan entah girl mana, so i sambung tido. I am damn tired guys. And pernah kantoi chat dalam FB and phone dia semua. Dia ni pun ade masalah untuk uruskan duit. I kerja penat semata nak try to support dia bangun balik and supaya dia dapat kerja. I sewa motor untuk senang pergi kerja, kitorg takde duit sampai nak isi minyak pun takde. Pernah i tumpang posmen halfway sb motor mati tengah highway. Nak beli makan pon kadang ikat perut makan roti. Disebabkan masalah transport, i selalu datang lambat so i berhenti kerja and cepat2 cari kerja lain yang senang dapat public transport. I bagi dia kereta i lepas kereta i keluar bengkel, and i gave him my 1 st salary to him to get a laptop, supaya dia boleh start cari kerja. As he mention he needed that. I hutang orang like RM1500 ( aku xpernah berhutang before waima macam mana susah pon life aku, xpernah sesusah ni) that money for him star up bisnes. Tapi tak jalan, so hutang lagi RM3500. company build i started pergi ssm and pay stuff.His 1st payment dari job dia, satu sen pon dia takde nak hulur, jangan kan hulur. Tanya pon takde, tau2 duit habes je. But hutang i jenis cepat2 clear kan dulu. Kerja dia membuta even ade project baru, petang nak senja baru lah pergi site. which is memang problem, sampai i kena turun site and handle some stuff myself. I have no knowledge about his job tapi i learn, so i turun padang and to help him, i do it myself some of the job which is itu kerja wak wak kontrak. Kereta kecik i tu lah yang guna untuk angkut whatever stuff nak pergi site. Naseb tak angkut batu bata or scaffolding je. Kerja berjudi even takde bakat berjudi. Tak dapat judi mesin, judi online berhabes ribu ringgit. Makan minum rokok berhutang kat mamak kedai depan, dapat gaji i settlekan semua every month. See why i penat ? Ni kire summary jelah. Banyak sangat nak story.
Pendekkan cerita , as i dont know whether its true or not. Dia asyik sedih dan nanges dengan situasi kitorg ni. My guy friend yang tau pasal ni pulak asek push me to stop thinking bout Leo as he is useless. I ni pulak tak boleh dengar dia susah, dia sakit or dia jadi ape ape. I masih Concern. Dia yang paling rapat dengan i dalam dunia ni beb, mesti lah i peduli. Kadang dia cakap takde duit nak makan or perlukan duit, I bebel tapi I tetap hulur. Dalam hati i biarpun kita tak bersama , i tetap doakan Leo berjaya dalam hidup . Pernah i demam tak larat nak keluar rumah, Leo tanya dan call tapi i marah marah. Keep asking me dah makan ke belom. Tapi dia insist beli kan makan (he know my FAV food) dan sangkut dekat depan pintu rumah i. HAHA. (He never done this before).
Ade satu mase ni his family keep calling me in the morning at the office, telling that Leo wants to get married with another girl which is he only knows her like 5 days, and the family keep asking me to get back dengan Leo. (konon nak ugut i get back dengan dia) Like i said i will not!. lantak dia lah nak kawen dengan sapa pon. i memang dah nekad xnak dengan dia lagi. And his family said kalau i terima Leo balek, he might change after married, so maybe i can give him a chance. So i advise them just accept her lah, who knows dia berubah dengan that girl.
Happens to know after that Leo dah ade another girlfriend baru, i mean real GF since i notice how he story bout her. To be honest, feeling agak jealous sebab dia tu rapat dengan i je. Korang pernah rasa tak bila bestfriend korang ade kawan lain, haaa... macam tu la.Tapi i tak kacau diorang . Let them be, atleast dia dah move on, good things.
Leo making it, dia makin okay lah sikit since dia dapat kerja baru. Then tak putus asa, lunch mesti ajak i pergi makan. Sometimes tak sempat lah my time nak collab dengan dia. Sometimes dia akan cerita lah pasal GF baru dia ni. I ni suka joke dengan dia and tanya soalan soalan bodoh, for us bende tu funny. It still is. HAHA. TApiiii... dia ni pelik lah, dah ade GF tapi keep asking me to be with him. Siap belikan bunga dan coklat. (Whole life dia tak pernah buat ni dengan i). Still called me Baby,even i refuse and asked him to stop calling me by that as dia ni dah ade GF. And actually i menyampah panggil panggil baby when we no longer together. But he said he still love me. He still got feeling towards me, and im the only one that he loved the most.Dia ni serious ke tak dengan GF dia ni. Dalam hati ade jugak fikir, entah entah dia ni saja buat cerita pasal GF dia sebab nak i jealous kot. But i never bother to think more about that.
And i rimas my guy friend keep asking me to stop helping Leo, jadi i pon stop be friend with that guy.
Sampai lah satu waktu Raya he prefer to spend it with me, i said i wanna go far to release my stress. Since i dont have a family, i takdelah kampung nak balik. Last time pon i balik kampung si Leo ni mase bercinte dulu. Tapi i fed up bila orang tanya kenapa tak balek kampung. Then asked bout my dead parents pulak. Malas lah. I dapat bonus kerja, takde masalah bab duit ni nak pergi mana I nak pergi. Leo nak ikot mana i pergi, penat i halau dia balik kampung dia or balik kampung GF dia. Tapi buang masa je.
The vacation is the best time i ever had in my life. I tak pernah travel like that and spending money like nobody business (cuti Raya Panjang oii) . Halfway to vacay place kereta pulak bateri out. Naseb i memang i ade knowledge handle stuff alone, and i called my insurans to tow and replace the battery. Dia ade belanja i jugak, like shopping, makan and stuff,ambil hati i lah katakan. (Masa ni dia baru start bisnes lain dari skop kerja dia). And i still jokes about his GF which is , that girl is real and they all together. I asked him pergi balik kampung his GF pon taknak. So i ni confuse dia ni serious or tak (dalam masa yg sama he treat me like his GF) .
Anyway the new business pon, we started together actually. As i mentioned, dia ni takde transport to handle stuff like pergi mana2 still using my car, but this time i dah ambik balek my car, (which is penat i fought for it, siap i bocorkan tayar kete i sendiri and nyaris i nak pecah my own rear mirror sebab i geram) and hutang kereta and saman all together cecah RM5k. i settled everything my own. -see why i really fed up ? Dia start new business and i help him to bring him around to buy stuff and sometimes i do delivery for him. Dia dengan GF dia takde transport time ni. And i still can freely scroll his phone, and i saw the conversation with his GF which is jealous sebab selalu dengan i. So i replied to her using his phone ( which is i know kind of like super duper annoying attitude) sebab i dah terbiase like that. I replied " kalau taknak dia selalu dengan aku, kau beli lah kereta and u guys go around together easier". (perangai aku mcm haram kan) IK. And dia memang dah biase dengan perangai biadap aku.
After habes raya, GF dia dpt lah kete baru, katenye bapak dia kasi. i pon tak check lah. So i tak kisah sangat, i pon slow2 mcm jarakkan diri. I cuba berkawan dengan another guy and cuba isi masa lapang dengan cara i. I memang suka living alone, buat ape nak buat. Tapi Leo selalu mengadu GF dia xboleh handle business dia, lintang pukang dengan postage and all. So i was like malas lah nk bother, bukan urusan i. Ajar jelah GF kau tu. HAHA. I was up and down dengan Leo dlu, so this is her time pulak lah nak rasa. Takkan baru 3 bulan dah give up.
Leo ni, i tak faham ape masalah dia. Dia keep asking about the man that i always go out with. so i bagitau jelah pasal mamat tu tapi tak detail lah, sebab mamat tu kawan biase i je. (Actually mamat tu pon dah fed up bila lepak asek cakap pasal Leo, and he said i tak moved on) IDK. So Leo asked me to stop jumpa that guy lah ape semua. Eh rimas..
While im with my own world tak kacau life dia, dia tak pernah putus text even once a day. Nak di jadikan cerita satu hari, tgh pagi buta, while i was sleeping ade orang pecah masuk bilik i guna tingkap belakang rumah, he was about nak capai my handbag beside me, lucky i tersedar bila the rod kena bahu i. Seriously masa ni memang takot gila. Macam trauma pon ade. I tak tau siapa i nak contact, like seriously. Naseb ade akak housemate bilik atas. Sumpah menggigil masa ni. Then i told Leo, he asked me to go to his place, untuk teman i malam tu and Leo asked me to move from there. Dia akan carikan rumah baru which is studio apartment, lagi secure dia cakap. Dia cakap dia pon risau. Esok tu i pergi balai polis and buat report. Seram betol.
And actually masa ni Leo like seriously nak get back dengan i but i tak rasa dia serious, dia cakap dia nak break dengan GF dia. Dia cakap takde feelings and all. Taktau lah mana nak percaya, actually dia ni kalau berbual 100 cakap 1 belum tentu betul. To prove his right, i asked him to dump his GF or i sendiri akan pergi tanya, so dia cakap bagi dia masa. Sebab dia tak sampai hati nak break her heart like that. Then i cakap so u choose lah mana u nak. He said he chose me. I dont believe him. Show me !
Business Leo ni, i buat paperwork and HR stuff from my office, most of the time cari source and supplier or some buyers. Benda ni betul2 buat i busy with my own life. And Leo asked me to quit my job so i can handle his business which is he said that im the one who can understand what he needs. Promised me that he will give me my share, actually company pon buat account nama kami berdua. I handle those, but my percentage i just put 20% je. (He advised me this ) . I hired secretary and all to do proper company, sebab taknak jadi macam bisnes dia sebelom ni. (bisnes sebelom ni pon pemiutang asek call and contact me to get him, dia ni suka avoid problem, alasan taknak fikir problem) .
There is one day, i texted his GF to meet her. She was scared i think, so i asked her to choose the place to meet. Tapi hari yang sama jugak he was about to give me the new house key. Sengaja i mintak dia cari kat mana i nak jumpe GF dia, coz i nak tengok reaksi dia. I met his GF and talk a little, pada masa yang sama dia text dah sampai and dia lalu, hajat hati dia nak ajak i lunch sama, while he peek smiling and hand over to me the key, he saw his GF beside me. Muka dia dah berubah and cepat cepat dia blah. I texted him, "mana kau nak pergi, kau settle bende ni hari ni jugak !" Jadi lah aksi kejar mengejar, antara kereta kecik aku dan kereta besar dia. ( He got the car coz business was doing good) Well i ade satu apps yg boleh kesan kemana je dia pergi. Psycho kan aku HAHA, sebab aku dah penat asek kene tipu. Last stop dia dekat je dengan office dia, masa tu jumpe client, so dah banyak borak dengan his GF ni. So i dah faham lah ape yg jadi, i lagi kenal Leo. Dia punya putar belit i dah masak.I biarkan dia settle kan dengan his client first and all. Dah settle i saw him came out from the place towards his car's. Again we followed and i texted him. Dia pening. Dari pukol 6PM sampai 8PM aksi kejar mengejar, and dia gave up and asked me to meet him dekat one of the cafe nearby. Last i asked him, "aku nak tau tu je, Dia atau Aku. choose now or never". Dia pon text lah i dia pilih i dan dia text GF dia said he still loves me. Well im done for today, i asked his GF to go and meet him, i got the answer and its enough. Coz i know what will happen after. So i get away from that place, he texted me telling his GF cry like a river,well i dont give a damn. Aku dah biase. Asked me to meet somewhere together with his GF, so jadi lah perbincangan 6 mata, i was sitting behind and he was with his GF infront of the car. I asked, what else. His GF opens the door and sit outside, He said his GF redha kalau jadi bini number dua . What ?! (actually aku takde terfikir pasal kawin pon lagi, tapi GF dia sampai mcm tu skali. ) damn gurl..I said its okay, i prefer not to interfere. I gave him the house key back and i walked towards my car. He run after me and grab me said he love me and asked me to get into the car back while his GF was already inside the car. Keadaan jadi sunyi kejap, suddenly his GF keluar dari kereta and blah. Kitorang sambung borak , and his phone rang. He get out from car and after 2 minutes came back. He said when i was running away, he grab me but when his GF was away he act nothing bout that. So GF dia ni jelaous lah pasal tu. After that aku dah penat so aku blah je balik rumah aku. Fed up dengan drama merepek ni.
Lepas kejadian tu few days, Dia cakap dia dah break dengan GF dia, but dia tak boleh menipu dengan i, mesti kantoi. One day i stay dekat office dia sebab he asked me to wait for him, i just wait in the car je. ( he dont know that i was in the car infront of his office) . After an hour, i saw his GF car's. Lalu sebelah i je, so i saw what happened . Dia baru keluar dari kereta GF dia, so i texted him. Dia macam gelabah. Right there he entered his car and i was furious ! I was about to go to his GF car and tell about everything. He stopped me. My gila dah sampai,he come to me but i drove away to chase his GF. I text him, ill follow his GF and i will tell about everything. I was at my rage, sampai situasi jadi kejar mengejar, dia kejar i from his car, i langgar kereta dia and i stop, i keluar kereta i and sepak kereta dia. And i teruskan perjalanan cari his GF. Untill dia gave up and we met, nearby the place when we was talking together the other day. On the street i shouted and i saw his car nearby. Hampir lah dia nak tampar muka i coz i cabar dia. Masa tu memang i gila.
Rupanya, the day i got my new house, the GF got it too . Both new house rent je, so dia cuma tolong byr upfront. No wonder lah nye punnn.. HAHA..
Permintaan i simple je, GF dia atau I. Kalau dia pilih GF dia, he can just go and dont bother my life, kite putus segala hubungan yang ade and i wont contact him anymore even i akan block dia from any social. Maksudnya putus dari segalanya, sebab i nak move on and i want him to move on and focus dengan life dia jugak. we both have our own life kan. Sampai bila nak mcm ni. Sampai bila i nak concern pasal dia je like i dont have my own life, sampai bila nak kasih sane sayang sini and sampai bila nak buat i confuse. Kalau dia pilih i, dont bullshit me as i damn know all his shit. Thats all.
CONTINUE...
Monday, August 1, 2011
Who The Hell Are You ???
i have no idea who am i.. where should i go and what should i do..nothing in my blank mind that i cant observe and keep it So somthing mingle in my head regarding this new environment that i have to deny..its normal that when woman and men become friends.. they will have this kind of feelings that they feel they click together.. maybe both of them feel the same or maybe one of them.. and another just acting normal.. And in this situation.. I am sorry i have to say that i need to stay away from it.. Its not that i dont like you.. but i like you as a friend..and i really hope you can keep that kind of relation forever.. since you feel different i think i should stay away.. because both know.. you cant pretend its normal anymore.. i will feel weird and you will feel its kind of love treat. oh dear.. can we just be friend.. being crazy together and share everything together.. just like siblings and both just like twin.. hurm... ;(Terus melangkah melupakanmu
lelah hati perhatikan sikapmu
jalan pikiranmu buatku ragu
tak mungkin ini tetap bertahan
Perlahan mimpi terasa mengganggu
kucoba untuk terus menjauh
perlahan hatiku terbelenggu
kucoba untuk lanjutkan hidup
Engkau bukanlah segalaku
bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
usai sudah semua berlalu
biar hujan menghapus jejakmu
giving both times to re-think and relief.. we will miss each other but that is the only good thing continue.. lesson learnt. noted. ;)
Friday, July 29, 2011
Cinta itu Komplikasi Hati Kata Mereka..
Ramai yang cakap cinta tu suatu rasa pedih,sakit dan perit,bagi yang pernah lalui kesakitannya.Dalam pada masa yang sama mereka tak pasti apa itu cinta..same la kite..i dont care what is love, which is love and how it feel. BUT cinta tu bukan pemberi rasa sakit,pedih dan perit,malah orang yang sedang bercinta merasakan cinta itu bahagia,kegembiraan dan ada juga yang katakan ia suatu rasa yang menakjubkan,tp apabila terguris,dilukakan,diabaikan,dan segala rasa yang diterima tak dikembalikan seperti mana diberi.atau lebih tepat,tak seperti yang dijangka berlaku itu la maksudnya cinta itu sakit,pedih, or whatever.What i really wanna say is..depend what experience u got when u in love,thats what u will feel. Tapi CINTA bukan perasaan.ia terlalu subjektif untuk letakkan cinta itu perasaan,kalau cinta adalah perasaan,kenapa mesti cakap cinta tu menyakitkan..cinta itu indah..cinta itu segalanya.. cuba cakap sakit itu menyakitkan,indah itu seindahnya sounds weird kan? soooo mi amigos come on chill it up,once ur heart break theres a tear from your eyes,and i'm not suprise if u say u cant accept love anymore coz i think i understands what u will feel after ur love juz go away with ur happiness.Spesifikasi cinta membawa semua rasa bergantung pada pengalaman masing-masing..cinta indah bagi yang sedang bercinta,cinta itu perit bagi yang telah pun disakitkan..sabarlah dengan dugaan cinta bagi yang ingin mengenal erti cinta :)
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Monday, July 25, 2011
As A Teenagers
Loneliness has Taught me everything in this world except how to forget the Person who made me....
L O N E L Y.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Teenagers Block
Looking around just like a stranger..
who am i, owh damn it..dont ever ask..
coz yeah i'm a person u dont even wanna noe..
walking alone on the street is my hobby..
breaking the wall is my drug..
and facing the truth is my job..
and also it will be my circle of life..forever..
Well known as a CLiche/chaos!
Friday, July 22, 2011
THE FACT
Jiwa KAU keras,Ego KAU tinggi, bagi KAU..Rela kau bangun sendiri. Kepercayaan KAU hanya pada diri KAU,janji KAU tak kacau hidup orang dan tak minta simpati orang.KAU x pernah rasa rugi walau apa KAU capai melayang-layang,KAU kata itu fate.KAU cuba sedaya upaya KAU,kalau gagal bukan salah KAU,dan KAU tak pernah salahkan orang mahupun pencipta. Mungkin bagi orang KAU pentingkan diri sendiri.Tapi tak salah kalau sedetik KAU berfikir yang KAU layak membuat pilihan.Itu diri KAU bukannya mereka..Dan mereka tak mampu ubah kehidupan KAU melainkan diri KAU sendiri. Kerana ternyata pilihan hidup itu ditangan KAU.
Copy from FB.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Confuse A little Snooby
Confuse.. yeah most of us mesti confuse.. even sikit pon.. entahla.. i confuse dengan confusing.. Apa aku nak sebenarnye.. Mana aku nak pergi.. apa aku nak buat.. siapa aku utk berada disini dan kenapa aku mesti terus disini.. confuse kan.. tapi makin confuse bile aku asek ulang soalan sama.. sampai lah waktu terus berlalu.. dan tibe2 confuse tambah lagi.. eh kenapa cpt sangat waktu berjalan sampai aku xsempat utk jadi apa2..berade di mana2.. atau untuk fikirkan jalan penyelesaiannya.. so i learn.. dont think too much.. live ur life well.. u will collect those gems and there is time u put those gems together to make a diamond with colorful rock. and someday you will remember which road u used before, that makes those gems looks dull and dark.. but still.. when you pour it together infront of you.. you will see how beautiful life is.. you went thru everything.. and those sadness and happiness you've been thru, makes you feel worth it.. So stop thinking too much before something coming.. open your heart,hand and mind as wide as you want your life to be.. switch your brain to be wise and matured enough to handle upcoming situation..believe.. that everything is gonna be alright... everything is gonna be okay.. ;)
Friday, October 2, 2009
Enjoy The Show
LiFe is a maze,and LoVe is a riddle,i dunno where to go,i cant do it alone,i've try, and i dunno why,i'm just a lil gurl,lost in a moment,i'm so scared but i dont show it,i cant figure it out,its bringging me down..i noe
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Friends
Kawan..tak berapa Specific... Tapi dari perbezaan itu bukan bermaksud kita berhak untuk melabel siapa di sebelah kita. sahabat,rakan,teman atau pun kawan..terpulang pada diri masing2 label apa dan source mana kamu semua ambil. Yang penting mereka adalah salah satu cermin untuk kehidupan kamu. Mereka adalah cermin untuk masa depan kamu juga. berdampingan dengan rakan atau sahabat yang nakal.. tidak semestinya kita adalah mereka.. erti cermin di sini adalah kehendak kita. Jika kita pastikan cermin kita sentiasa bersih.. bimbing mereka.. kalau tak.. terpulang pada kita utk biar dan mungkin suatu masa kita rasa mahu menjadi mereka.. Alang2 membawa cermin biarlah cermin tu bersih.. cara utk pastikan cermin kita bersih.. pastikan haty dan fikiran kita bersih.. positif pd dasar yg negatif.. positif pada masalah dan punca masalah.. setiap ape yg terjadi masih mampu diperbaiki.. kecuali masa.. masa yang pergi bukan sekadar tidak boleh diganti malah tidak mampu kita sebagai insan biasa untuk cuba membaiki ke masa lampau dan ubah haluan hidup dr cara yg sebegitu.. Jadi rakan..sahabat..kawan atau teman.. pastikan kita yakin dimana kita berdiri.. kite kukuh tegak di mana prinsip kita.. Be Positive !
Pilihan Untuk Hidup
Dalam hidup sentiasa ada dua pilihan,dan kita tentukan pilihan tu.Pilih untuk msa depan atau kepentingan semasa.Kadang hati salah menduga.Pilihan yang disangka baik untuk kita adelah pilihan yang menghancurkan hidup kita,tapi sepatutnya kita redha dgn ketentuan itu,dan cuba cari jalan untuk mengharunginya.Bila org bercakap ttg.."aku xde pilihan,tu je jalan yang aku ada"..urm..slalu kita dgr.Tapi sbnrnye,dia xnak mnggunakan pilihan yg dah diberi.Kesian..
Bila masalah menimpa,keadaan yg dipersalahkan,org disekeliling di tundingkan.Sbnrnya apa yg terjadi semua silap dri sendiri,itu la yg slalu berlaku.Mungkin kita pernah silap jalan tp belum tentu kita xboleh cari jalan keluar.Percaya diri dan xmudah putus harapan.X semestinya apa yg kita harungi hari nie adalah untuk selamanya.Setiap yg diberi atau dianugerahkan,kita pasti kena pulangkan suatu hari nanti.So jangan sentiasa bersedih untuk sesuatu yg bukan selamanya hak milik kita,jaga dgn betul dan pastikan kita bersyukur.biarpun ditimpa dugaan,bersyukurlah. Itu tanda kita yakin dengan pilihan yang kita buat dan kita mampu untuk diduga.Atas kita untuk memilih jalan yg betul untuk menempuhi segala yg mendatang.Tapi bila da silap pilih redhalah..Mungkin dugaan yg mempunyai seribu hikmah untuk kita,xsemestinya ia membunuh masa depan kita selamanya,sebelum buat sesuatu fikir dgn mendalam,biar orang kata terlalu jauh kita berfikir,jgn org kata terlalu bodoh pilihan kau. so mcm org putih,cakap life is too short to wake up with regret.so love the people who treat u right.Love the one who dont juz because u can.believe it happen for a reason.if u get second chance,grab it with both hand. If it change ur life,let it. Kiss slowly. Forgive quickly. God never said life would be easy. He just promise it would be worth it. Bertabah lah..bersabar lah.. wahai haty..cekal lah wahai jiwa.. bertahan la wahai kudrat.. :)
Bila masalah menimpa,keadaan yg dipersalahkan,org disekeliling di tundingkan.Sbnrnya apa yg terjadi semua silap dri sendiri,itu la yg slalu berlaku.Mungkin kita pernah silap jalan tp belum tentu kita xboleh cari jalan keluar.Percaya diri dan xmudah putus harapan.X semestinya apa yg kita harungi hari nie adalah untuk selamanya.Setiap yg diberi atau dianugerahkan,kita pasti kena pulangkan suatu hari nanti.So jangan sentiasa bersedih untuk sesuatu yg bukan selamanya hak milik kita,jaga dgn betul dan pastikan kita bersyukur.biarpun ditimpa dugaan,bersyukurlah. Itu tanda kita yakin dengan pilihan yang kita buat dan kita mampu untuk diduga.Atas kita untuk memilih jalan yg betul untuk menempuhi segala yg mendatang.Tapi bila da silap pilih redhalah..Mungkin dugaan yg mempunyai seribu hikmah untuk kita,xsemestinya ia membunuh masa depan kita selamanya,sebelum buat sesuatu fikir dgn mendalam,biar orang kata terlalu jauh kita berfikir,jgn org kata terlalu bodoh pilihan kau. so mcm org putih,cakap life is too short to wake up with regret.so love the people who treat u right.Love the one who dont juz because u can.believe it happen for a reason.if u get second chance,grab it with both hand. If it change ur life,let it. Kiss slowly. Forgive quickly. God never said life would be easy. He just promise it would be worth it. Bertabah lah..bersabar lah.. wahai haty..cekal lah wahai jiwa.. bertahan la wahai kudrat.. :)
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Notes for me
You've been through a lot in your life. Broken and bruised, you still keep going. You tend to hold promises dear to yourself. You would never lie to yourself. You believe in people and you see the true beauty in everything. Family and friends, whether small or big, you keep them close to you; they mean everything to you. You couldn't bear to break anyone; it would hurt you the most. You don't believe in happy endings, but you do believe that there is always light to every dark; hope to every lost cause; beauty in the filth; two sides to every story. You believe that no one should be alone; you've been through that as well. keep being honest to yourself and others. Let no one tell you otherwise. You walk a long road, believer.
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