HI DARLING !
Lama tak masuk and merepek2.. since i have nobody to share so i wanna share this story to you guys,
*cerite ni campur bahasa. Was made on 31/08/15 - 23:18PM and i try to make it short even its damn long.
LEO 2006 - 2016
Well the story starts like this, mule kenal this guy like 2006 lepas habis sekolah. Since i tak further my study so i work at this one of the saloon in the City. I met this guy, he was cute..shy..humble.. and some kind of nerd la. I notice dia suka i since i suka kacau dia ni. Dan kitorg pon mule lah berdating. Masa tu keje kemana, ape kemana, Happy together katenye. Selama kami kenal xpernah kami tau tentang hal diri masing2 lebih dalam. Even we both tak tau nama sebenar masing masing,he willing to ride to me after work everyday just to sent me back home or just to go makan. 1st time i langgar lampu merah (which is memang takde kereta lah pukol berape pagi dah) and i was a bit social nak compare dengan dia masa tu. So kitorg broke up tanpa penjelasan ape ape. Dia dah habis belajar, and dia nak balik ke Kampung dia. For me masa tu , well people leave anyway, why should i bother. I was never serious pon sebab masa tu maseh muda remaja,yang i tau enjoy je. 😂 .
Well i went to nowhere, teruskan hari2 mcm biase. Tapi ade lah contact kadang kadang thru FB, Msg and last time 2012 contact via Blackberry. You guys tau kan time tu tengah sebok2 org nk share BBPIN, kitorg pon same. But on that time dia ni ade girlfriend tau, and i takdelah bother hal dia ni sangat.
By 2012 i started my life in KL. Merantau tempat org sorang sorang, so kat KL i keje hotel dekat tengah tengah bandar. Happen that day he called me, right after a little text. he called me at 2AM. Dia cakap dia nak nyanyi 😅 . Actually kejap lagi i nak kerja at 6AM tau . Tapi taknak kecewakan orang, takpelah i tadah jelah mata dan telinga ni untuk dengar. Dia nyanyi Over The Rainbow. Hurm.. and our conversation didn't stop by the song. Hari hari pulak chat sampai lah satu hari dia ajak lepak. Pergi jelah lepak, he brought his friend but i came alone.
Days goes by. Dia ni kerja tak jauh dari KL, tak jadi masalah lah setakat nak drive thru. Mase tu dia ni tengah problem dengan kerja dia ni, masa tu pulak i ni single,easy nak pergi mana mana. I pon pergi lah jumpe dia dekat sane, as he claimed that he got fever. Kitorg makin rapat, dia pun cakap dia ni dah single balik. Entah i tak pasti lah kesahihan tu. HAHA. So dipendekkan cerite ni, hubungan kitorg going well. Sampai lah tahap dia kena balik kampung dia sebab kerja dia ade masalah.
29 April 2013
I planned dengan one of my girlfriend nak visit dia kat sana, since KL ke kampung dia ambil masa 5 jam perjalanan But thing went mess, i accident and i was scared. Tak pernah accident before. At first i malas nak call and inform dia sebab it was a surprise, but then my girlfriend keep asking me to asked for his help to come. Dia ni takde transport nak datang, but still he came by renting a car.
Everything started on 29 April 2013. Officially together.
Kitorang together sampai kenal family and planned to get married, but honestly im not ready. Banyak sangat perangai dia buat i makan hati.
By 2015 we went apart. And to be honest, i do miss him since dia lah satu satunya manusia i shared everything. I takde mak ayah or adek beradek, kawan ade tapi semua jauh. Dengan dia lah paling i rapat. No secrets between us. I nak dia berubah, belajar untuk serious dan tanggungjawab dalam keputusan yang dia buat. He told me he love me. But i dont see the effort, i yang makan hati ade lah. He tried every way to keep me as his GF, But i dont feel like it. I dah nekad nak putus even dia tak agree.
In the mean time i kenal sorang mamat ni. I baru lepas break so takde hati lah nak bercinte ke ape, setakat kawan borak je.
Then dalam masa yang sama Leo tetap cari i, stalk i, chat i, and asek tanya "kalau i dah berubah,u balek dengan i tak ?" . Serious hati perempuan ni kesian, tapi dia kena belajar erti menghargai .
Dalam pada masa sama jugak Leo cari kawan baru, to ease the pain. I got no problem with it as that might help him to move on. Hati ni tak sampai nak tengok dia sedih macam tu, tapi sampai bila nak sabar dengan perangai dia. I tak pernah curang, tak pernah nak cari yang lain. I xpernah putus asa bila dia tak kerja, i cuba usaha cara i, tapi sampai bila. As i mentioned. Even macam tu pun , i gave him my car for him to move around as kerja dia perlukan transport. unlike mine, i boleh tumpang kawan or public transport.
OK lah i story a bit okay what makes me disappointed sangat about him. Start dari accident tu, im the one yang kerja cari duit, we live together. Yes . Pagi i nak pergi kerja i akan masak, and i kerja hotel so balek agak lambat jugak kadang kadang. Kerja dia kat rumah ? membuta je dari pagi sampai ke malam. Pernah i jalan kaki dari tempat kerja malam malam pukul sebelas tengah hujan renyai, sebab dia membuta dan handphone dia mati. The way to our house, semua nya high way. So tell me about it. Another thing, dia ni xpernah habes dengan masalah perempuan. Pernah i balik kerja penat, i just wash up and sleep. In the middle of the night i terjaga i spot dia tengah chat senyum senyum , i intai. Dengan entah girl mana, so i sambung tido. I am damn tired guys. And pernah kantoi chat dalam FB and phone dia semua. Dia ni pun ade masalah untuk uruskan duit. I kerja penat semata nak try to support dia bangun balik and supaya dia dapat kerja. I sewa motor untuk senang pergi kerja, kitorg takde duit sampai nak isi minyak pun takde. Pernah i tumpang posmen halfway sb motor mati tengah highway. Nak beli makan pon kadang ikat perut makan roti. Disebabkan masalah transport, i selalu datang lambat so i berhenti kerja and cepat2 cari kerja lain yang senang dapat public transport. I bagi dia kereta i lepas kereta i keluar bengkel, and i gave him my 1 st salary to him to get a laptop, supaya dia boleh start cari kerja. As he mention he needed that. I hutang orang like RM1500 ( aku xpernah berhutang before waima macam mana susah pon life aku, xpernah sesusah ni) that money for him star up bisnes. Tapi tak jalan, so hutang lagi RM3500. company build i started pergi ssm and pay stuff.His 1st payment dari job dia, satu sen pon dia takde nak hulur, jangan kan hulur. Tanya pon takde, tau2 duit habes je. But hutang i jenis cepat2 clear kan dulu. Kerja dia membuta even ade project baru, petang nak senja baru lah pergi site. which is memang problem, sampai i kena turun site and handle some stuff myself. I have no knowledge about his job tapi i learn, so i turun padang and to help him, i do it myself some of the job which is itu kerja wak wak kontrak. Kereta kecik i tu lah yang guna untuk angkut whatever stuff nak pergi site. Naseb tak angkut batu bata or scaffolding je. Kerja berjudi even takde bakat berjudi. Tak dapat judi mesin, judi online berhabes ribu ringgit. Makan minum rokok berhutang kat mamak kedai depan, dapat gaji i settlekan semua every month. See why i penat ? Ni kire summary jelah. Banyak sangat nak story.
Pendekkan cerita , as i dont know whether its true or not. Dia asyik sedih dan nanges dengan situasi kitorg ni. My guy friend yang tau pasal ni pulak asek push me to stop thinking bout Leo as he is useless. I ni pulak tak boleh dengar dia susah, dia sakit or dia jadi ape ape. I masih Concern. Dia yang paling rapat dengan i dalam dunia ni beb, mesti lah i peduli. Kadang dia cakap takde duit nak makan or perlukan duit, I bebel tapi I tetap hulur. Dalam hati i biarpun kita tak bersama , i tetap doakan Leo berjaya dalam hidup . Pernah i demam tak larat nak keluar rumah, Leo tanya dan call tapi i marah marah. Keep asking me dah makan ke belom. Tapi dia insist beli kan makan (he know my FAV food) dan sangkut dekat depan pintu rumah i. HAHA. (He never done this before).
Ade satu mase ni his family keep calling me in the morning at the office, telling that Leo wants to get married with another girl which is he only knows her like 5 days, and the family keep asking me to get back dengan Leo. (konon nak ugut i get back dengan dia) Like i said i will not!. lantak dia lah nak kawen dengan sapa pon. i memang dah nekad xnak dengan dia lagi. And his family said kalau i terima Leo balek, he might change after married, so maybe i can give him a chance. So i advise them just accept her lah, who knows dia berubah dengan that girl.
Happens to know after that Leo dah ade another girlfriend baru, i mean real GF since i notice how he story bout her. To be honest, feeling agak jealous sebab dia tu rapat dengan i je. Korang pernah rasa tak bila bestfriend korang ade kawan lain, haaa... macam tu la.Tapi i tak kacau diorang . Let them be, atleast dia dah move on, good things.
Leo making it, dia makin okay lah sikit since dia dapat kerja baru. Then tak putus asa, lunch mesti ajak i pergi makan. Sometimes tak sempat lah my time nak collab dengan dia. Sometimes dia akan cerita lah pasal GF baru dia ni. I ni suka joke dengan dia and tanya soalan soalan bodoh, for us bende tu funny. It still is. HAHA. TApiiii... dia ni pelik lah, dah ade GF tapi keep asking me to be with him. Siap belikan bunga dan coklat. (Whole life dia tak pernah buat ni dengan i). Still called me Baby,even i refuse and asked him to stop calling me by that as dia ni dah ade GF. And actually i menyampah panggil panggil baby when we no longer together. But he said he still love me. He still got feeling towards me, and im the only one that he loved the most.Dia ni serious ke tak dengan GF dia ni. Dalam hati ade jugak fikir, entah entah dia ni saja buat cerita pasal GF dia sebab nak i jealous kot. But i never bother to think more about that.
And i rimas my guy friend keep asking me to stop helping Leo, jadi i pon stop be friend with that guy.
Sampai lah satu waktu Raya he prefer to spend it with me, i said i wanna go far to release my stress. Since i dont have a family, i takdelah kampung nak balik. Last time pon i balik kampung si Leo ni mase bercinte dulu. Tapi i fed up bila orang tanya kenapa tak balek kampung. Then asked bout my dead parents pulak. Malas lah. I dapat bonus kerja, takde masalah bab duit ni nak pergi mana I nak pergi. Leo nak ikot mana i pergi, penat i halau dia balik kampung dia or balik kampung GF dia. Tapi buang masa je.
The vacation is the best time i ever had in my life. I tak pernah travel like that and spending money like nobody business (cuti Raya Panjang oii) . Halfway to vacay place kereta pulak bateri out. Naseb i memang i ade knowledge handle stuff alone, and i called my insurans to tow and replace the battery. Dia ade belanja i jugak, like shopping, makan and stuff,ambil hati i lah katakan. (Masa ni dia baru start bisnes lain dari skop kerja dia). And i still jokes about his GF which is , that girl is real and they all together. I asked him pergi balik kampung his GF pon taknak. So i ni confuse dia ni serious or tak (dalam masa yg sama he treat me like his GF) .
Anyway the new business pon, we started together actually. As i mentioned, dia ni takde transport to handle stuff like pergi mana2 still using my car, but this time i dah ambik balek my car, (which is penat i fought for it, siap i bocorkan tayar kete i sendiri and nyaris i nak pecah my own rear mirror sebab i geram) and hutang kereta and saman all together cecah RM5k. i settled everything my own. -see why i really fed up ? Dia start new business and i help him to bring him around to buy stuff and sometimes i do delivery for him. Dia dengan GF dia takde transport time ni. And i still can freely scroll his phone, and i saw the conversation with his GF which is jealous sebab selalu dengan i. So i replied to her using his phone ( which is i know kind of like super duper annoying attitude) sebab i dah terbiase like that. I replied " kalau taknak dia selalu dengan aku, kau beli lah kereta and u guys go around together easier". (perangai aku mcm haram kan) IK. And dia memang dah biase dengan perangai biadap aku.
After habes raya, GF dia dpt lah kete baru, katenye bapak dia kasi. i pon tak check lah. So i tak kisah sangat, i pon slow2 mcm jarakkan diri. I cuba berkawan dengan another guy and cuba isi masa lapang dengan cara i. I memang suka living alone, buat ape nak buat. Tapi Leo selalu mengadu GF dia xboleh handle business dia, lintang pukang dengan postage and all. So i was like malas lah nk bother, bukan urusan i. Ajar jelah GF kau tu. HAHA. I was up and down dengan Leo dlu, so this is her time pulak lah nak rasa. Takkan baru 3 bulan dah give up.
Leo ni, i tak faham ape masalah dia. Dia keep asking about the man that i always go out with. so i bagitau jelah pasal mamat tu tapi tak detail lah, sebab mamat tu kawan biase i je. (Actually mamat tu pon dah fed up bila lepak asek cakap pasal Leo, and he said i tak moved on) IDK. So Leo asked me to stop jumpa that guy lah ape semua. Eh rimas..
While im with my own world tak kacau life dia, dia tak pernah putus text even once a day. Nak di jadikan cerita satu hari, tgh pagi buta, while i was sleeping ade orang pecah masuk bilik i guna tingkap belakang rumah, he was about nak capai my handbag beside me, lucky i tersedar bila the rod kena bahu i. Seriously masa ni memang takot gila. Macam trauma pon ade. I tak tau siapa i nak contact, like seriously. Naseb ade akak housemate bilik atas. Sumpah menggigil masa ni. Then i told Leo, he asked me to go to his place, untuk teman i malam tu and Leo asked me to move from there. Dia akan carikan rumah baru which is studio apartment, lagi secure dia cakap. Dia cakap dia pon risau. Esok tu i pergi balai polis and buat report. Seram betol.
And actually masa ni Leo like seriously nak get back dengan i but i tak rasa dia serious, dia cakap dia nak break dengan GF dia. Dia cakap takde feelings and all. Taktau lah mana nak percaya, actually dia ni kalau berbual 100 cakap 1 belum tentu betul. To prove his right, i asked him to dump his GF or i sendiri akan pergi tanya, so dia cakap bagi dia masa. Sebab dia tak sampai hati nak break her heart like that. Then i cakap so u choose lah mana u nak. He said he chose me. I dont believe him. Show me !
Business Leo ni, i buat paperwork and HR stuff from my office, most of the time cari source and supplier or some buyers. Benda ni betul2 buat i busy with my own life. And Leo asked me to quit my job so i can handle his business which is he said that im the one who can understand what he needs. Promised me that he will give me my share, actually company pon buat account nama kami berdua. I handle those, but my percentage i just put 20% je. (He advised me this ) . I hired secretary and all to do proper company, sebab taknak jadi macam bisnes dia sebelom ni. (bisnes sebelom ni pon pemiutang asek call and contact me to get him, dia ni suka avoid problem, alasan taknak fikir problem) .
There is one day, i texted his GF to meet her. She was scared i think, so i asked her to choose the place to meet. Tapi hari yang sama jugak he was about to give me the new house key. Sengaja i mintak dia cari kat mana i nak jumpe GF dia, coz i nak tengok reaksi dia. I met his GF and talk a little, pada masa yang sama dia text dah sampai and dia lalu, hajat hati dia nak ajak i lunch sama, while he peek smiling and hand over to me the key, he saw his GF beside me. Muka dia dah berubah and cepat cepat dia blah. I texted him, "mana kau nak pergi, kau settle bende ni hari ni jugak !" Jadi lah aksi kejar mengejar, antara kereta kecik aku dan kereta besar dia. ( He got the car coz business was doing good) Well i ade satu apps yg boleh kesan kemana je dia pergi. Psycho kan aku HAHA, sebab aku dah penat asek kene tipu. Last stop dia dekat je dengan office dia, masa tu jumpe client, so dah banyak borak dengan his GF ni. So i dah faham lah ape yg jadi, i lagi kenal Leo. Dia punya putar belit i dah masak.I biarkan dia settle kan dengan his client first and all. Dah settle i saw him came out from the place towards his car's. Again we followed and i texted him. Dia pening. Dari pukol 6PM sampai 8PM aksi kejar mengejar, and dia gave up and asked me to meet him dekat one of the cafe nearby. Last i asked him, "aku nak tau tu je, Dia atau Aku. choose now or never". Dia pon text lah i dia pilih i dan dia text GF dia said he still loves me. Well im done for today, i asked his GF to go and meet him, i got the answer and its enough. Coz i know what will happen after. So i get away from that place, he texted me telling his GF cry like a river,well i dont give a damn. Aku dah biase. Asked me to meet somewhere together with his GF, so jadi lah perbincangan 6 mata, i was sitting behind and he was with his GF infront of the car. I asked, what else. His GF opens the door and sit outside, He said his GF redha kalau jadi bini number dua . What ?! (actually aku takde terfikir pasal kawin pon lagi, tapi GF dia sampai mcm tu skali. ) damn gurl..I said its okay, i prefer not to interfere. I gave him the house key back and i walked towards my car. He run after me and grab me said he love me and asked me to get into the car back while his GF was already inside the car. Keadaan jadi sunyi kejap, suddenly his GF keluar dari kereta and blah. Kitorang sambung borak , and his phone rang. He get out from car and after 2 minutes came back. He said when i was running away, he grab me but when his GF was away he act nothing bout that. So GF dia ni jelaous lah pasal tu. After that aku dah penat so aku blah je balik rumah aku. Fed up dengan drama merepek ni.
Lepas kejadian tu few days, Dia cakap dia dah break dengan GF dia, but dia tak boleh menipu dengan i, mesti kantoi. One day i stay dekat office dia sebab he asked me to wait for him, i just wait in the car je. ( he dont know that i was in the car infront of his office) . After an hour, i saw his GF car's. Lalu sebelah i je, so i saw what happened . Dia baru keluar dari kereta GF dia, so i texted him. Dia macam gelabah. Right there he entered his car and i was furious ! I was about to go to his GF car and tell about everything. He stopped me. My gila dah sampai,he come to me but i drove away to chase his GF. I text him, ill follow his GF and i will tell about everything. I was at my rage, sampai situasi jadi kejar mengejar, dia kejar i from his car, i langgar kereta dia and i stop, i keluar kereta i and sepak kereta dia. And i teruskan perjalanan cari his GF. Untill dia gave up and we met, nearby the place when we was talking together the other day. On the street i shouted and i saw his car nearby. Hampir lah dia nak tampar muka i coz i cabar dia. Masa tu memang i gila.
Rupanya, the day i got my new house, the GF got it too . Both new house rent je, so dia cuma tolong byr upfront. No wonder lah nye punnn.. HAHA..
Permintaan i simple je, GF dia atau I. Kalau dia pilih GF dia, he can just go and dont bother my life, kite putus segala hubungan yang ade and i wont contact him anymore even i akan block dia from any social. Maksudnya putus dari segalanya, sebab i nak move on and i want him to move on and focus dengan life dia jugak. we both have our own life kan. Sampai bila nak mcm ni. Sampai bila i nak concern pasal dia je like i dont have my own life, sampai bila nak kasih sane sayang sini and sampai bila nak buat i confuse. Kalau dia pilih i, dont bullshit me as i damn know all his shit. Thats all.
CONTINUE...
